Finding your voice

My target retirement date is rapidly sneaking up on me.  It’s now less than 9 months away.  In place of my excitement and anticipation, this sneaky feeling of fear is creeping in. The voice in my head is telling me, “don’t quit your day job”, “have your next job lined up before you quit your current job”, and “retirement isn’t all it’s cut out to be”.  These are messages my parents played over and over and I still hear them in my head.

I am reading a book called, “Let Your Life Speak: Listening for the Voice of Vocation” by Parker J. Palmer.  This book was recommended in a series I am attending on finding your passion in life or finding your authentic self. What has really surprised me is the premise of not saying, I want to be X, Y or Z when I grow up, but rather figuring out what are the things that bring me joy and happiness that will guide me to a vocation.

What I am good at that I also enjoy doing?  Listen to what life is saying, if something is too hard, is it really meant to be or is there something that is calling you that you are denying?  Lean in to those things that inspire and make you feel whole.

I am really trying to sit and listen to my inner voice.  There is so much daily noise in my life I think that is one of the things I seek, a few quiet moments to seek clarity.  

Even at my age, approaching a possible early retirement, I am still searching for what I want to be when I grow up.  I think it is true that we never stop learning and seeking things that bring us joy.